August 21, 2018
“Everything you will ever need will come through a relationship.” Dale Bronner
I remember my first day of school at Juilliard, when former President Joseph Polisi said to the students, “Look to your right and to your left; these are faces that you will see the rest of your life in your career, so treat these relationships carefully.”
I have seen in society how we are taught to place so much emphasis on “i” without realizing how being able to build and maintain a relationship is what will determine our reach and success in life.
We are people first, and our jobs and careers are secondary. I really that the times were I have made my biggest mistakes connecting with someone have been when I focused on what I wanted from them, instead of on their humanity.
I’ve learned a few things about building relationships professionally and personally that I’d like to share.
Start a relationship with no expectations
One thing that I find has really helped me build genuine connections, is to not have an angle that distracts me from seeing a person for who they are. Now, to behest, this is hard for me because I am very strategic, but when people sense that, it can repel them immediately.
Honesty always wins
With all of the mentors that I have been fortunate to have, honesty is what helped me and what I continue to rely on to build serious connections. Sating my true intuitions in the beginning is key because nothing can ever be built on a dishonest foundation.
Give you way to where you want to go
My mother used to always say, “We need to be givers, and even when you don’t feel you have what you desire, continue sowing because God will bless those who give.” So basically, life gives to the giver, and takes from the taker.
Allow Space
Any powerful relationship I have ever had, took time, trust and patience; there should be no rush in building genuine relationships.
So far, I have listed positive ways to build and maintain relationships, but sometimes I have completely ruined relationships because of the following;
My ego
Thinking I deserved something, that quite honestly I didn’t, and seeing to adjust my attitude to the situation.
As human beings , we are so intricate. I know that as my life has continued to change, some people now view me as a resource or as someone they want to connect with so they can accomplish their goals in life. However, I always respond to those who really want to know me for who I am, and not for what I do.”
This is honestly so difficult for me, because it’s easy to just focus on what I want, but as I gain more wisdom in life, I find that the key in building bridges in relationships, is truly being intuitive and genuine. Everyone must come to the table with something, and that way a great exchange can happen.
I get questions all the time, about how did I get the chance to experience some of the things, I am blessed to experience but it all started from learning how to positively build relationships and when I make mistakes within relationships; seek to humbly rebuild them.